“I live in constant fear of a bad feeling, it’s a psychological scar that won’t ever be healed”, Natashia Lee explains as she recalls the traumatic time she was stabbed seven times at school by her childhood bullies.
The teenager woke on the morning of 10 November 2005 with a sense of dread in her stomach after suffering nightmares about her tormentors who denigrated her for her perceived love of heavy-metal music.
Later that day, she would be stabbed seven times after exiting the dinner queue at Collingwood College in Surrey by three girls, requiring extensive eye surgery after being injured by a pair of scissors. Two would go on to receive community orders, while her stabber would be detained for over three years.
Now 20 years later, Ms Lee, then known as Natashia Jackman, has been left horrified after a spate of recent school stabbings which are all too reminiscent of her own experience. Last month, a 15-year-old pleaded guilty to the manslaughter of Harvey Willgoose, also 15, who was killed at All Saints Catholic High School in Sheffield.
A 14-year-old girl was also handed 15 years in detention after a knife rampage at her school in Ammanford, which left two teachers and a fellow pupil with stab wounds from her father’s multi-tool.
Due to the trauma of her own experience and her parents’ horror at the school’s inability to protect her from her bullies, Ms Lee relocated to the US to continue her education.
Despite her physical wounds healing, the mental scars remained and she soon began to suffer from PTSD and flashbacks. Not only was she left traumatised, her mother later took her own life having believed she had “failed” in her duties by sending her to school on that horrific day.
“I lost all faith in humanity. I’d hear a British accent and I would freeze,” she said. “I do sometimes wonder if my bullies have kids, and do they worry about school crimes and look back with the hindsight of adulthood at their roles as perpetrators?”, she said.
Now living in Yorkshire with her two children, she is “terrified” for the next generation.
“Policy has not changed enough,” Ms Lee told The Independent. “Preventative measures, where are they? My biggest concern is that when it happened to me, the only social media we had was MSN and MySpace.
“Society has now evolved and we’re looking at a generation now that lack empathy and compassion as they see the world through the lens of social media.”
Since returning to the UK after a teaching stint in Thailand and as a charity worker in Kenya, Ms Lee has established her own company ESG Pro, which she now hopes to utilise to improve conditions within the UK education system.
ESG Pro is a compliance consultancy that reinvests 20 per cent of client spend into social impact, starting with school safety through the flagship initiative School Impact Project.
The programme is designed to deliver safety improvements, environmental upgrades, and governance support to schools — entirely funded through business-sector partnerships.
“Schools don’t have funding for pencils, let alone having knife arches. For me, this isn’t just work — it’s personal.
“I know what it feels like to walk into a school and wonder if you’re safe. I’ve seen the gaps, the vulnerabilities, and the heartbreaking limitations schools face because of budget constraints.”
Aimed to prevent weapons from being brought onto the playground, knife arches have increasingly been proposed as a potential strategy to make schools safer.
However, with a single-walk through detector costing as much as £7,500 and schools having to fit the bill, it is an impossible expense for many state schools that have budgeting constraints.
While stabbing incidents in schools remain relatively rare, the former children’s commissioner for England said in February that it was a “national crisis that needed a national response”.
According to a House of Commons research document published in late January, in the year to the end of June 2024 there were 19,903 possession of a knife or offensive weapon offences in England and Wales that resulted in a caution or conviction.
Children aged 10 to 17 were the perpetrators in 18 per cent of the cases.
“With the turnover rate of teachers, children aren’t forming the same bonds with them that existed years ago, and that lack of personal relationship means students don’t know who to turn to,” Ms Lee said.
“We need to have more school counsellors in place, there needs to be a point of contact when things are getting tough and the mental health support is so important.”
She has now partnered with the Ben Kinsella Trust, which tackles knife crime through education, and has secured 19 schools to sponsor with funding via her project.
“I want to do something more with my story because I survived,” she said.
“I’m not healed, I have never healed because I am partly stuck as a 14-year-old girl. If I could do something with my life and career and I say I’ve made one school safer, I can say it meant something.”
If you are experiencing feelings of distress, or are struggling to cope, you can speak to the Samaritans, in confidence, on 116 123 (UK and ROI), email [email protected], or visit the Samaritans website to find details of your nearest branch.
